Care Bears? Really?

Yes. Really.

I had a dream last night in which we were solving a mystery. Who is we? I don't recall. I think Robb was there. Maybe our friend Erin. I dunno. Anywho, we kept finding all these little plastic Care Bear toys lining the road. We followed the trail, finding baby ones and big ones, some big ones with baby Care Bear fetuses in them, stone cold. Eventually, we ran across this big plowed field with huge incoming storm clouds, and we found a little barn.

Next to the barn was a tiny yellow house that apparently contained a big, fat freak of a man. He came out in overalls and nothing else, and he started trying to tell us to go home because it was about to storm. I looked in his back yard and there were three tiny yellow Care Bears standing in a circle there.

I looked away.

I looked back, and there were a bunch of them, blue and yellow and red, all in a circle.

The man started to explain his plot to dominate the world by controlling the weather through Care Bear power. And then he summoned a huge storm...

I woke up bemused. Confused. But ultimately, I was thinking about what a great idea it would be to harness Care Bear power for weather control!

Umm...yeah...I take no responsibility for what my brain does when I'm asleep...or even half awake.

Out

All Kinds of Crazy...

Robb and I were in Target, and he just stops in the aisle on the way to get milk and starts laughing.  Shaking.  And pointing.  "Come here!" he managed to squeak through his laughter.

I walked back to where he'd stopped.  "What the heck are you laughing at?"



Look.  Look again.  Is that not the most adorable, mischievous little coffee pot you've ever seen?



It makes me wonder if it was intentional.  Who wouldn't want a coffee pot that looks like some kind of high-ranking religious official penguin with a single shiny flipper?  Oh man...and this is part of the reason I love him so damn much.  He has this way of making every day and every mindless chore into an adventure.

His car is currently in the shop because his cousin backed into it.  So we have a rental.  This rental has some odd buttons on the dash, such as this one:



Yes.  Cat Folder.  I'm just glad we didn't bring Marbles with...

In other news, after sushi last night we decided we'd try mochi ice cream.  We got green tea and mango.



It wasn't terrible, but the fondant-like covering over the balls was a little off-putting.  It's been dubbed "squishy stuff."



Lyndsay and Ben seem to be fascinated by it.  It was kind of gross...like silly putty.  If we'd have had a newspaper, we'd have tried to transfer ink onto it.  Instead, we ate it. 

And that's all the news that's fit to print.

Out

Celebrity-Adjacent...

So, some of you might know that the town in which I live is the town where a certain supermodel grew up.

My old boss went to high school with her and said she was pretty and smart and athletic...all those things that make you want to grind a person's face in the dirt because they're so friggin' perfect!  Or is that just me?



Anywho...Tuesday's meeting was pretty standard (as if I've ever been to a business meeting...), talking about profits and bonuses and new products, etc. etc. etc.  This woman stands up to receive an award for bringing in a huge customer.  I think to myself, "She looks kind of severe...and orange."

The next day we're talking about the meeting, and the woman who is training me says, "You know that's Cindy Crawford's mother, right?"



No joke!  I totally bashed Cindy Crawford's mother in my head...whoops!

Apparently I work with Cindy Crawford's mother...how about that?

Out

Coffee, Anyone?

Today, I'd just like to say this:



Sometimes you just need a little Will & Grace to get the day started.

Out

Birthday Weekend...

I had a fantastic birthday!  Friday night's party was a good time filled with Moscato, homemade Sangria, and cheesecake.  I ate too much, drank too much, and generally felt great besides being really full. 

Saturday Robb and I drove around.  No, really.  We decided to go to Sonic for lunch, which was about an hour away.  Then we drove around Chicagoland just enjoying the music in the CD player and the gorgeous day.  Taking 19 around the backside of O'Hare?  So neat.

And then we chilled at home, hit the arcade later that night, and decided to have a quiet night at home.  We blasted through Contra for the NES just for kicks, and then called it a night.

And yesterday was church, writing group, and dinner with my family at Yen Ching.  My mom gave me the contents of the family change jar all wrapped up by my devious little sister, and she gave me my grandmother's antique tea (sake?) set.  It was such a sweet and thoughtful gift!  I loved that grandma so much (we called her Gramma Gramma)!  Robb got me Wario Ware D.I.Y. for my DS and Marbles got me Mario & Luigi:  Bowser's Inside Story for my DS!  Sweet gifts always make me smile!  AND!  I have so many leftovers I won't be able to finish them all, but I'm going to give it my best shot! 

And today at 2?  After I'm all bloated on leftover Chinese food?  JOB INTERVIEW! 

Yes yes.  Oh, and I discovered the funniest video of all time:



Seriously.  I don't even have to watch it and I start laughing about it...oh my gosh. You might want to actually go to YouTubeand watch it, since it won't fit here, sadly.

And with that?  Have a great day!

Out

Renege...Uncut Version...

So, I know I said yesterday that I was so sick of talking about jobs.  And I am.  But.

I applied for two bank jobs today.  A friend came through with an unexpected recommendation that went ALL THE WAY to the BANK OWNER!  So, I sent an email with my resume to one, filled out an application for another, and Ka-BAM!  I'm applied.

Let's just hope I'm employed soon...

***EDIT***

So, I applied at a different bank today thank the one I sent my resume to, because a friend of mine told me (when I ran into him and his girlfriend at Target last night--random!) that they were hiring.  So, I got an email to take a pre-recorded telephone interview...so I did.  Then HR calls me and asks about my termination from National City (ugh)!  THEN!  The bank manager calls me and asks me to interview on MONDAY!  Woot!  So...maybe something WILL work out!

***EDIT AGAIN***

And then I got a call from the bank I sent my resume to asking me to fill out an application, so I went to a branch and did just that!  It's like I hit the jackpot today...with that and yet ANOTHER Water Guy sighting (he waved at me first!).  Crazy...happy birthday to me!

***END***

In other news, it's turning out to be a lovely day!  I got my new T-shirt, and I got my prize from Club Nintendo...maybe I'll model them later.  Sweet.

***ANOTHER EDIT***

So, I got all nice and showered (second time today) and put on my cute new shirt.





Yes.  That IS Super Mario sushi.  Frog Mario on one end, Blooper on the other, and Cheep Cheeps in the middle.  Amazingly morbid and cute stuff!  Anywho...there's that.  And my Club Nintendo Prize?



It's a game/stylus holder for the DS, which is LOVE.  And the best part?



Rainbow stylus collection!  Yessirree!  And now you know what a big dork I am...if you're just joining us.  If you're a long-time reader and you didn't know that...shame on you!

***END***

And!  I think it looks nice enough outside that I might be able to slip in a bike ride.

Then?  Tonight my friend Katie is throwing a party for herself and me in celebration of our joint birthday (Sunday the 11th).  So...it's all kinds of great stuff!

OH!  And as an early birthday present, I ran into the Water Guy at Wal Mart last night.  He was browsing video games.  SCORE!!!  Did I say hello?  No...my brain went to mush and my only thought was "FLEE!!!"

Bah...I'll get it right one of these times.

Out

Jump Drive Dump...

I was clicking through my jump drive and I came across some great photos.

Defective signs are one of my guilty pleasures.  Any time we're out I look for them.  We once saw one that was supposed to say Randy's Market.  It said "Randy's Ma."  Love it!

And then there was "Road anger."

And this one:



That's right.  The Abbott Ho.  That's in the north side of Chicago, sort of near Boystown.

So great! 

And I don't know if I'm the only person to love these buttons, but I take pictures of them all the time:



I just love that it's two men.  Maybe I should sell this image to some kind of gay gaming blog...it would be pretty much perfect.  I've got about eight of these pictures (from all over the country), and they never stop amusing me.

And lastly, here's a picture of me squinting in the sun...in my old glasses...after not having shaved for three days.  It's not pretty.



Yikes.  Why do I do this to myself?

Anywho...there's that.

Out

Clean House...

I retain an inherent distrust for people whose houses are so clean, they could go on the market at any time. 



You know what I'm talking about.  No fingerprints on the walls.  Nothing personal out ANYWHERE.  Glossy floors, eerily perfect furniture.  Yes.  THOSE people.

What have they done that is so bad that they are constantly worried they'll have to sell their house and get out of town without having time to clean?  No thank you.  I can't settle in with people who can't settle in.  Give me this, any day.



Well, okay...maybe that's a bit extreme.  How about...this?



Coffee stains?  Yes, please.  Dirty dishes?  Even better.  Rumpled blankets on furniture?  A lack of throw pillows?  All fine with me!  These are my people.  They will not be skipping town any time soon.  I would be completely comfortable around them. 

But that scary, guest-bathroom-no-one-uses, Realtor-ready stuff creeps me right-the-heck out!  Am I the only one?

Okay...now I'm just procrastinating the inevitable writing session for the day...DON'T WANNA!

Out

It's a destiny!))

I awoke wondering what to post about, only to find this in my Xanga inbox!

My name`s Cynthia
I really feel shy, but I have to tell you, Viewtiful_Justin, that you`r just so cool... It was a wonder to find ur profile but now I am sure it`s a destiny!))
You are so pretty... but I am sure that in ur real life u will excite me more and more, again and again!! -))

I would like to get closer 2 u, Viewtiful_Justin!
This site removed my pictures... (
so the most interesting and hot photos I hosted here: http://yourpersonalprofile.com/account/852775645/
Viewtiful_Justin, I think you`ll like them and will write me something 2 begin our thrilling challenge :)!!!
love you honey :))

Hmmm. I wonder what, exactly, our "thrilling challenge" is. Perhaps a woman's feeble attempts to come on to me? Perhaps a computer's feeble attempts to get me to look at straight porn and, thus, infect me with some horrible virus? It would be a thrilling challenge indeed to try to get rid of that!

How come none of you tell me "you'r just so cool" or "in ur real life u will excite me more and more, again and again!!-))"?

You're failing in your duties, people, and this mongoloid had to do it for you. Shame!

So Pretty...Out

The Cookie Told Me So...

I cleaned out my wallet the other day, and in doing so, I realized two things:  I really need to clean out my wallet more often, and I eat a LOT of Chinese food.

You may wonder what the two have in common.  Well, when I gt my fortune cookie, I break it open, eat one half, read my fortune, and then eat the other half.  And then I stick that little slip of paper in my wallet, for some reason.  I'm a packrat, and I always have been.

So it was a little shocking when I cleaned out all the pockets and nooks and found about fifty fortunes.  I sifted through, separating the goats from the lambs and burning off the chaff...or whatever mixed Bible metaphor you want to use...and I arrived at the top ten fortunes in my wallet...complete with runners up and FML fortunes.

And remember, the Chinese apparently spend a lot of time in bed, so don't forget to add "in bed" to the end of them.  Or something...

10.  A pleasant surprise is in store for you.
9.  May you have great luck.
8.  A Partnership shall prove successful for you.
7.  Love is hard work, but always worth it.
6.  Your talents will prove to be especially useful this week.
5.  You will be involved in a social activity.
4.  Now is a good time for a bit of solitude.
3.  Woe to him that is alone when he fails, for he has not another to help him up.
2.  If you want something, you must earn it.
1.  You can't ride in all directions at one time.

Some of those are especially hilarious with the addition.  Favorites?

Runners up:
You have an active mind and a keen imagination.
There is excitement to be found wherever you go.
You usually have good relationships with others and are considerate and cooperative.
Love's a journey, not a destination.
You will be fortunate in the opportunities presented to you.
Your sense of humor is enjoyed by all.

Again...in bed.

And then there were a few that were truly FML moments.

Work was getting really stressful, and things were changing.  I was resisting those changes because they were stupid and pointless.  And then I got this fortune:  "Develop some flexibility in your point of view."

Seriously?  The cookie is going to tell me how to live my life...fine. 

So I made a change and decided to let everything just slide off my back...to not care enough to get mad about stupid work crap.  Specifically, I just decided I'd be a robot, doing what I was told and nothing extra until I found something better.  And then I get this:  "Avoid agreeing with people merely to keep the peace."

Fuck. My.  Life.

Stupid cookie...but they tried to remedy that blow with this one:  "You will become an accomplished writer."  Well, that's something then, isn't it?

Remember, the cookie may not always be right, but it's always sweet.

Out...in bed.

Email Carnival...

So, I just got this email from the boy:

"If you ever wanted to buy a used carnival ride, check out www.usedrides.com"

He's at work. As am I. And people marvel at how the Internet raises productivity?

Out