Reminder: CORD MCCOY.

Weekend Synopsis...

Friday? Work. Rocky Horror. A girl behind me got upset during the rain scene and screamed, "OH, HELL NO! I just got my hair permed! We outta here!" They left early. Noobs.

Saturday? Work. I saw my brother. My mom's drunken 50 year old friend told me she'd like to fuck me. Her drunken friend told me she wasn't afraid of my boyfriend. And...Brandon wouldn't sit down. On the way home I got pulled over for honking my horn as I left town. Two officers. Written warning. BULLSHIT!

Sunday? Work. And my brother and sister came over for dinner. We had fun. I introduced my brother to Cee Lo Green's "Fuck You." It's his new favorite song. He said it was life changing like the first time he saw a vagina. Eww. He said plaid shorts are gay. Robb's a great cook. And my brother doesn't wear underpants.

Monday? Nothing yet. Day off. National Coming Out Day! I'm gay. Robb and I talked about high school crushes, locker room moments. I had a brownie for breakfast. My brother and I are supposed to hang out before my dad picks him up at five. The Hair Cuttery didn't answer their phone. I have to call my bro.

Tomorrow? Board meeting and a day off. Haircut?

Out

That Was Unexpected...

I had an appointment with a dentist today at 10:30. I made the appointment yesterday. I didn't expect that would happen so fast.

I went in, and they told me they'd just be looking at my teeth and getting an idea of my overall dental health and creating a treatment plan so I could see what I was getting myself into. So, they poked and prodded and counted and remarked. Yes, I'm missing two teeth. No, that half-tooth in the back doesn't bother me now and has never hurt. Yes, I know I should floss.

And then they found something...

They kept referring to it as a "microdent." He said it's not a baby tooth. It's just...a tiny tooth that is extra and had lodged itself between to other teeth, just for funsies. So, since I'm apparently such an anomaly, he called in the hygienists and they all "ooh"ed and "ahh"ed and "that's really weird"ed over my mouth. And then we moved on. I wondered what he thought of it, how common it is, and what they were planning on doing about it...but we moved on. The hardest part of being at the dentists was not being able to talk and ask questions when I wanted to.

So.

He decided we should start with the upper left part of my mouth, around where I had my first tooth pulled. There were cavities in the teeth next to it and one other. He said I'd need my wisdom teeth removed. And they wanted to talk to me about getting implants where those two teeth were removed.

And then they told me that the upper left section of my mouth they could do today. So...I panicked. I wanted out, somehow. I've never had a cavity filled. I've never had much dental work at all done. And they wanted to just...get right to it. I wondered aloud if I'd be okay. They assured me that if I'd had a tooth pulled, I'd be okay. Except...the dental hygienist said that I'd "just be awake for this procedure." When I told them I was awake for the extractions, they all jumped back and were like, "Oh, honey, then this is going to be a cake walk."

And I explained to them my fear of needles, and they numbed my gums up with a swab...and another swab...and a third. And I didn't see or feel the needle. I just...closed my eyes and let them work. And before I knew it, I was getting drilled and filled.

And not in the good way.

I didn't expect it would happen so fast.

But there was no pain--just a lot of water and noise. I don't hate the sound of a dental drill. I do hate having to keep my mouth open so long. Ouch. My jaw is sore...

But I have three fillings now, and...that's good. Next Tuesday I get to have the lower left done. Maybe I'll be able to eat by then...

Out

I was just told that my teeth hurt because the dentist is the only person whose tool I'm afraid to put in my mouth.

"Turn the Beat Around" is officially my jam.

Poem No One Will Read...

9-22-10

Change.
Open that drawer and dump its contents
into a big black bag.
Then.
Deposit your dreams, childish things, urges
into that empty drawer.
Live.
Pretend you don’t want, don’t hurt with desire,
Grow up, wear a tie, pay your bills.
And whenever you feel the urge to peek
into that drawer of taboos,
Repeat.

---

Out.

Meow...

*ahem*  Mrow.  Is this thing on?  

Oh, good.  Listen.  Mom stepped out for a minute...maybe he's bringing me food?  Hi.  I'm Marbles.  You might know me as the fat kitty in the chair.  I think that's what Mom calls me.  Mrow.  I'm a little hungry.  Does anyone have some food?  I don't want--wait...was that a wrapper crinkling?  Oh, no...just my tail brushing some junk off the bed.  Why do they put all their stuff on the best places to sit?  The food room table is always cluttered.  Behind the picture box thingy is full of cords, and whenever I get on the counter where all the delicious dishes are, they both yell at me.  Mom wakes up from a sound sleep if she hears me get up there.  It's how I get him out of bed some mornings when I can't find his glasses to chew on.  

What was I going to say?  Oh, right.  Food.  Does anyone have any food I could have?  As you can see, I'm wasting away to nothing.  A kitty needs his strength, and I'm almost too tired to yowl at the top of my lungs and race around the house today.  Mom doesn't appreciate my singing, especially when she's asleep.  But as long as I stay an arm's length away from him, then I can do whatever I want.  Then he calls me naughty kitty and sends Dad after me.  

And Dad...oh man...he flips me over and rubs my belly.  He puts me on his shoulders to ride around.  He pries my lips apart and looks at my "little teefers," whatever those are.  But he gives me cheese...so I let him.  I bite Mom when Mom does it, because he's always telling Dad to stop giving me food, since I'm so fat.  It's muscle, I swear!  I just wish it wasn't so hard to clean my belly and feet.  I lick and lick and lick, and then I'm all out of breath so I sigh.  Mom laughs at me.  Dad starts cooing and picks me up to rub my belly that I JUST CLEANED!

It's hard living with Mom and Dad...especially when I'm so hungry all the time.  Does anyone have any food?

How does Mom usually end these things?

Mee-Out