National Crazy Month...

NaNoWriMo is almost upon us. I am both giddy and terrified. So...you know...nothing special.

For those of you not in-the-know, NaNoWriMo is short for National Novel Writing Month. Every year I, along with a hundred thousand other crazy nutbars, write a 50,000 word novel in the month of November. Want more info? http://www.nanowrimo.org

You'll be glad you did it! I've written three complete novels in three years, and I'm hoping for a fourth.

What kind of novels, you ask?

The first year I wrote a road trip story. DePaul to UCLA loosely along Rt. 66. There was pot smoking, fights, a pregnancy, scorpions vs. cheerleaders, and a man who was not who he said he was...oh, and a house fire.

The second year I wrote a novel of horror and interior decorating. Hauntings, bad smells, a skeptical husband, a cute daughter, and the mystery of that tiny room in the basement...oh, and a house fire.

The third year I wrote a novel about a woman who has an affair with the guy that runs the arcade and her son who is gay and how they both find out what the other is doing. It had Dungeons and Dragons, bigotry, Ms. Pac Man, adultery, laughter, dating, and fake internet personals...oh, and a house fire.

This year will be the first novel that doesn't have a house fire, I think. Although...maybe I'll squeeze one in just for good measure. If I write about the current idea I have, it will be Jesus in space. Trust me. It's a scream!

I look forward to it (and dread it) every year, and this one is no exception. Is anyone with me on that?

Out

Top 5 Tuesday: Jobs Edition...

If you read my blog you know I hate my job.  If you hadn't realized it yet, let me say it explicitly.  I hate my job.  So when lisguitarist suggested I do a Top 5 Tuesday blog about jobs, I jumped at the opportunity!

Are you making sandwiches for ungrateful jerks?  Spending all day dealing with horrible customers?  Answering the phone with your Lee Press-on smile?  Serving food?  This blog's for you!  After careful consideration and much soul searching, I present to everyone my list of The Top 5 Jobs I'd Love To Try.

5)  Professional Blogger



If I could make my money doing exactly what I'm doing every day around here, I'd quit my crappy job in a heartbeat!  Leave banking for blogging?  Sure!  What's to lose?  I'd have no customers, no rules, and no one to answer to except my fans (and those crazy people who seem to hate me for no reason).  I can't see any downside.

4)  Runway Model



The photo says it all.  Who wouldn't want to be that guy?  Personal trainer?  Sure!  Wearing ridiculous clothes?  Why not!  Having my photo taken and plastered all over magazines and the Internet?  It's about time!  I'd get paid to be pretty and walk.  I mean, it's not much for personal worth aside from whatever you'd feel from being beautiful, but you get paid to walk twenty feet and turn around.  I don't even have to smile!  Sounds like the perfect job, honestly.

3)  College Literature Professor



This one is probably the one I'm most serious about.  It's been something I've wanted to do since college lit (more years ago than I care to admit).  There's nothing closer to being a professional student than this.  It would entail more school.  Fine by me!  I would have to talk in front of a group.  I could get used to that, especially if it were something I was passionate about.  And, to top it all off, I'd get to wear a sweet sports jacket to work every day!  Getting paid to read?  To teach others to love and appreciate what you love?  Jackpot!  I might have to look into grad schools...

2)  Backup Dancer



Heck yes.  Only because I'd love to bust out some moves and people point for different reasons than they normally do.  Really, I just wish I could dance, and this is most definitely an extension of that desire.  Bright lights and pumping music would be my new home, my blood, and my heartbeat.  Yes please!

1)  Editor at Hardest Level



Okay, okay.  I'll admit this one is sort of a plug.  But.  This is something that could happen.  I have a phone call today to talk with Eugenia about what an internship with Xanga's very own Hardest Level would entail.  Reading and writing about video games?  Count me in without one ounce of hesitation!  Editing?  Yes, please!  And perhaps even boosting readership and building relationships with more people around the Xangaverse?  That's, like, a dream come true! 

So there you have it: a frightening look into what I'd love to do.  Could I ever be all these things?  Perhaps.  Although I'd have to learn to sleepwalk like a model and blog at the same time...this could prove problematic.  Not to mention the trauma from teh people that would have to see me both disrobe AND dance.  Eek! 

What about your top five?

Until next time, friends!  Remember, submissions for Top 5 Tuesday blogs are always welcome.  Who knows, you could see your own idea on this very spot next week! 

Out

Obligatory Update...

Okay, all. Obviously there's nothing exciting going on in my life right now. If there were, I'd be updating. The last post I actually wrote was for my other blog, and all it contained was a snippet about how sometimes, when I eat peach yogurt, all I can taste is cheese.

It's true.

What's going on in my life?

I'm saving for vacation.
I rode my bike 5.5 miles.
I am sunburned and entering that itchy stage.
Punch Out!! for the Wii is phenomenal. It's every bit as good as the original NES game and maybe even better.
I repeat, "There you are. Have a nice day." seven hundred thousand times a week.
I got bitten by our cat the other day.
My boyfriend is still a gimp, but he's getting better.
I'm off Monday. Bank holiday.

Other than that...there's really nothing going on. So...my apologies for not updating.

Out

Tagged!

A great blogger, Jasmine at An Experiment in Poverty, tagged me for this one. I was thrilled.

Rules to follow... if you're the kind who follows rules: Respond and rework. Answer the questions on your blog, replace one question that you dislike with a question of your own invention, add one more question of your own. Tag five other un-tagged people.

What is your current obsession?
I guess it might be our new cat, Marbles. He’s freaking adorable. We just learned that he loves to play the blanket game, where we put him under a sheet and poke at him, and he fights back. So cute.

What are you wearing now?
I’m wearing my forest green sweater with the thin, horizontal grey stripes, my grey pinstripe pants, and my black argyle socks. It’s business casual, baby. But only because I’m at work. At this time of day at home, I’d be in my birthday suit.

Do you nap a lot?
No. Almost never, actually. Napping leaves me feeling groggy and disoriented for days. I must never have inherited that one from my mother. It’s about the only thing we don’t have in common.

What would you like to learn to do?
Cook. I’d love to learn to cook. I’m a terrible multitasker, so timing and doting on more than one thing on the stove is really hard for me. I always end up with cold noodles and sauce and hot bread. Or…you know…But I make a mean grilled cheese sandwich.

What’s for dinner?
I don’t know. I don’t usually cook. It’ll probably be something fast, since we have to eat between when I get off work at 6:15 and church at 8:15. I know it’s two hours, but I won’t get home until 6:30 and then it’s changing and playing with the cat and playing with the boyfriend…you know, time consuming stuff. We might just eat out.

What was the last thing you bought?
Yesterday I went to a thrift store in town and bought One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest, a book of random facts for Robb, and Elite Beat Agents for the Nintendo DS. Grand total? $10.83. I love No Strings Attached.

What is your favorite weather?
I love sunny, 70-80 degrees. Anything that makes for great picture taking. Cloud cover washes everything out…no fun at all. Although, I love a good rain, provided that I have nowhere to be.

What is on your bedside table?
I don’t sleep in my own bed. Mine is basically a guest bed in our apartment. But on the table is a drunken Homer Simpson lamp, three books (To Life: A Celebration of Jewish Thinking and Being, Best American Short Stories 200#, -- 8? Is it 8? – and Bearing an Hourglass), my checkbook and car payment booklet, my alarm clock, my change can, a box with all my random foreign coins in it (I should blog about that), a box of Kleenex (currently empty), and several small things I should probably throw away.

What is your most challenging goal right now?
Making enough money to pay my bills. I need a full time job. Working part time at a bank for under ten dollars an hour just isn’t cutting it for me.

Do you have a blog you read daily even when there are no updates?
I used to look at See Kyle Draw (kyle-cummings.blogspot.com) all the time, but now that he’s stopped posting artwork as often, I don’t go there as much. Other than that, Bent Objects (bentobjects.blogspot.com) is a great one.

What would you like to have in your hands right now?
Adam Levine, the lead singer of Maroon 5. Or twenty thousand dollars to pay off my loans.

What would you like to get rid of?
The extra body fat around my midsection. I need to start running or something…the abs I do crunches twice a day for are somewhere under that extra poundage. And, admittedly, it’s not much. But it’s enough.

What language(s) do you want to be able to speak?
I would love to speak German. Or Russian. I adore the German language.

What's one thing you're looking forward to?
See previous blog. VACATION!!!!! Although, admittedly, I'm a little bit freaking out about the cat being there without us for almost two weeks. I couldn't sleep last night because I was thinking about it. I need a cat sitter.

If you were to pick up a pen right now, what would be the first thing you'd write?
Probably the date. I always date something if I write it. Who knows when I’ll look back at it again. I had a great idea for a poem last night, and I let it get away without writing it down. Grr.

Who was your childhood crush?
Well, in my childhood it was the older brother of a boy I played with (with a last name like a gun). When I figured out what I actually wanted, though (read: high school), it was Jordan Swanson…oh man. I spent way too much energy thinking about that man.

What do you want to be... when you grow up?
A writer, a teacher, a librarian, a clerk at a bookstore…something. Maybe a cartoon voice actor. I’ve been told I’d be good at that. What I don’t want is to be defined by my career. I just want to be able to pay the bills and have a little something leftover to do what I love during my free time.

What (and when) was the last book you read?
I just finished reading On a Pale Horse a little over a week ago. It’s the first book of the seven-book Incarnations of Immortality series by Piers Anthony. I read five or six of them waaaay back in the day, when I was into fantasy and sci-fi, and I have always wanted to go back and read them again, if only to finish the series. They’re not as good as I recall them being, but nothing ever is.

I liked all of these questions, so I didn’t delete any of them. But I did add one of my own at the end. Now, to tag…

How about:
A Human Kind of Human
All Is Fair
Melissa

All right, then...

Viewtiful_Justin...Out

The Power of Ten--or Fifteen...

My friend Melissa (check her out) ran a feature on her blog today that I think it would be fun to emulate.

She did a "10 Things About My Disability" post that I thought was very informative and witty. And while I don't have a disability, per se, I do have a unique perspective. So I thought it might be fun to tell you fifteen things about myself.

So, onward!

1. I am not contagious. I know, this was Mel's first point, but really. You can't catch gay. What you can catch from hanging out with me, though, is well-timed humor and maybe a laugh or a yawn.

2. I am a bibliophile. My room is filled with stacks of books in front of shelves full of books. And on top of those shelves? Books. I adore them, how they look and smell, the sound of turning pages, the magic of words passed through time. It's a vacation in the comfort of my home, and I love it.

3. I always wanted a Chia Pet. Since the first time I saw the commercials during Thundercats and Transformers when I was just a tiny Viewtiful_Justin. I asked my mother to get me one. I wanted them for birthdays and Christmases every year for what felt like ages. And I never got one.

4. I have a thing for firefighters. It's true. Joe Regular? Meh. But when I find out he's a firefighter, his hot points go up five-fold. The hat, the coat, the trucks...all of it. I don't know any reason why this is. I've tried to explain it, and I've plumbed the depth of my childhood. Nothing. But I do.

5. I have an irrational fear of being abandoned in a public place. I don't care if it's a grocery store I go to three times a week and I'm the one with the car keys; if I look up and I can't see you, I get nervous. Anxious. And I have to stop shopping and come find you. I've never been abandoned in a public place. I've never really been abandoned anywhere. But if I can't see you...I'm afraid.

6. I used to have a great memory, but now...not so much. I was a vault. Lock it away and never lose it. Now? It's more like a sieve. Lots of holes...I put something there, and when I go to look for it again in ten minutes...gone! Names, dates, ideas...gone! That is, unless I write it down. If I put pencil to paper and make those marks,

7. I had a great one for number seven, and then I forgot it while writing the last one...hrmmm....oh! I got it! I was going to say that I love to sing. And I do! If there is a song on the radio that I know, I will be singing along. Not well, mind you, but singing along nonetheless. And if I don't know it? I'll be singing along by the second chorus. And, because of that, I judge a lot of music based on its singability. If it's not fun to sing along, I probably don't like it.

8. My feet are cold. Unless I am wearing shoes, I can guarantee you that my feet are cold. I'm sure it's poor circulation, although I've never been diagnosed or even checked out. But I've heard "Your feet are like ice!" enough times to know it's true.

9. I try to figure you out. When I am in public and I see two people together or a group of friends are all around one table at a restaurant, I try to figure out the dynamics of the group. I like to see if they seem like they're on a first date or it it's someone's birthday, if it's a work group or a school study date. I love figuring people out. People watching...to the extreme!!!

10. I find rudeness deplorable. When I say hello to a cahsier, I expect a response. When I talk to someone, I expect their attention. I hate seeing people come through the drive at work while they're on their cell phone. It bothers me even more to see them talking while they're inside and I'm waiting on them. I can't imagine how people could think that it's okay to do this. It's rude, and it's unacceptible. It's important to be polite.

11. I have written three novels. Each year I participate in National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo), and every year I've participated, I've won, which means I've finished three 50,000 word novels, each in 30 days in the month of November. It's crazy amouonts of fun. But...the funny thing is that I've never edited one of them. Never even gone back and read them.

12. I'm a gamer. Many, many hours of my childhood were spent (not wasted, spent) in front of the television with a Nintendo controller in my hand. Not Sega. Not Playstation. Nintendo. I am and have always been a die-hard Nintendo fan...although right now they're working very hard to lose my affections--what with their lack of games for true gamers and their mountains of shitty shovelware crap. But, I digress. The fact is, I play, and I always have.

13. I like pirate slang. When I greet people, it's "Ahoy-hoy." Sometimes when I finish packing things at work I say, "Thar she blows." And sometimes, for no reason, I let fly with a "Yarrr." But I don't particularly care for pirates or the Disney Pirate movies. It's just...a love for the sound of it all.

14. It's a texture thing. This is the line I use when I don't like a food. I love cheese, and I love yogurt, but cottage cheese? Those little lumps turn me off. Baked beans, kidney beans, navy beans? Grainy texture. Ick. Same with peas. And marshmallows? Don't even get me started on marshmallows! I don't understand how something can be simultaneously puffy, slimy, chalky, and squishy at the same time. Eww. Add Peep's crunchy sugar coating and you've got the most revolting thin on the planet.

15. I love. There is so much hatred in this world, and only love can set it straight. I want to try to do my part to reverse the ravages of hate. So, I love. I love people and animals. I love quirks and mannerisms, accents and hair colors. I love facial tics and fashion, expressions and emotions. I just try to love. And I fail at this regularly, but I'm always trying. And really, that's all that matters.

What are some things that people don't know about you? Post them up and let me know about them!

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