Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Preaching Drunk...

Last night I dreamt I was riding my bike to school (work?) from my old old house, and I crashed it and flew off into the cornfield, landing myself with a giant gash on the right side of my forehead. An instructor from college (Dr. Wandtke) stopped his car and took me to his house to get cleaned up. He handed me a tampon to wipe my face with and he told me he didn't have a mirror or a shiny plate or anything like that in his house that I could use. And then I was late for class (work?) and my car was still at home because apparently my family did not need to borrow it like they told me. But I rode to school (work?) anyway.

Stupid dreams. That was only one of a few I had last night. One involved Oz/Wonderland, a lot of ice, and a twenty story tall sword. Think Smithy. Oh, and my dad. Ugh.

Anycrazy...I won't bore you with my wacky subconscious.

Tonight is the night!

What night? You might ask...

Well, the night where we all get drunk at church!

Okay...okay...it's the Seder dinner. We have one every year to relive the captivity and exodus of the Israelites from Egypt. You eat strange, symbolic foods, listen to beautiful words, and drink lots of cheap red wine. No, seriously. It's like, "Blah blah blah...eat this strange food. Blah blah blah...drink your whole glass of wine."

I wasn't prepared for it last year...I got a little drunk. I think this year I'll try to scale back.

It's funny, though. This is the only year I've ever given up something for Lent, despite saying I wouldn't. And I'm not talking about giving up my job. That wasn't voluntary. But this is also the first year that Lent has actually meant something to me. It's a season of examining your life, of being in a hard place awaiting some good news, of getting rid of the excesses in your life and the things you know you should change. It's waiting for Spring. It's Spring cleaning for your life and soul.

I don't usually talk about my faith on my blog, but I really identify this year. I know a lot of you don't feel the same way, don't believe the same things, and that's perfectly fine. I don't expect you to. They're my beliefs, and they're not fact. They're not even popular among people who believe what I do. But you know what? They shape me. They comfort me. They allow me to love others when I don't want to. They are good. And in this Lenten season, when so much is thrown out, I'm keeping them.

Now let's all go to church and get drunk.

Out

Tuesday, March 30, 2010

What Can Brown Do For You?

Why does the UPS guy always show up when I'm naked? Seriously...

And why is my boyfriend getting strange packages that I have no idea about? And why didn't he respond to my text about it?

This morning is full of mysteries! Oooh boy! I'ma put on my brown houndstooth detective cap with the flaps and put my pipe in my mouth, grab my magnifying glass, and search for clues!

It's getting closer to my birthday, so I won't be opening that package. Who knows what's in it. The last time a strange package showed up at our door it was a Frank N. Furter costume. This time? Who knows!

Let me tell you. I'm a little spastic this morning for no good reason. I thought I'd already blogged, and then I realized I hadn't. And it's not even 10! What's the deal? I haven't had this kind of energy since...well, before I was fired, that's for sure.

AND!!!!

It's gonna be 70 this week. 75!!! Maybe it won't snow on my birthday (Apr. 11) for once! The last 2 years, it has snowed. Bitches. But hey...it's supposed to be 65 today. Maybe I'll go ride my bike. It sure would help me get rid of this spastic energy. BAH!!!!!!

Out

Monday, March 29, 2010

Weekend...What?

So...Friday I did this puzzle of my favorite city:



God, you can really see my OCD nature.  My phone is lined up exactly with the edge of the puzzle.  The coaster is lined up perfectly with that, and the box is lined up with the edge of the puzzle, too.  Oh, man...I'm bad about that...

...and then Robb and I went out with friends to Boystown, where we hit up Roscoe's, our favorite bar up there.  It's really the only one I've been in where I've felt completely comfortable.  I'm not really a bar kind of guy, honestly, so I was dreading going just a little bit.  But oh my gosh, we had a great time, despite some awkwardness.

See, I ran into my ex there.  Steve.  We broke up over 4 years ago after dating for 2 months.  It was mostly because he didn't pay me enough attention and also because he lived in the city and I was moving back to E-town with my folks.  So...not worth the drive, really.  But yeah...we were sitting in one of the lounges chatting with our friends Jim and Mike and Randle, and this guy walks in and turns away to go out on the dance floor.  I turned to Robb and I said, "Er...I think that might have been my ex."

So I texted him, because we're not on bad terms, and sure enough, it was him.  He hasn't changed a bit.  We chatted, caught up, he met Robb, showed everyone a photo of his giant...well...anyhow...he had it on his cell phone.  Awkward.  But it was nice to see him.  He's still as socially awkward as when I met him.

Right around that time, one of Robb's co-workers showed up with his date who looked really familiar.  Still not sure why.  But it was nice finally meeting this person who I've heard so much about.  Hopefully we'll get to hang out with them again soon.  They're good people.

Oh, and this guy who worked there, who I thought was really cute with his red hair and stubble (I'm a sucker for red hair), came up to me a few times to collect our empty glasses, and he says to me once, "I like your glasses.  Are they Prada?"  I told him, "No.  Actually they're Randy Jackson."  He made this really hilarious face, like, eww.  And he says, "Oh, well they look like Prada."  Umm...thanks!  Hooray for compliments from strange and cute boys...

Anywho, that was Friday night.  Saturday was the collage party for Script Frenzy.

We met at the Library, Ho:



It's pretty much that ghetto. 

But the writing center is gorgeously painted!



So, we baked for 4 hours in the heat, but we made a lot of progress!  I've got an idea now, that I'm sure I'll talk about later.  I came home and Robb and I got custard, and then I came home and took a nap, since I'd been out until 3 AM the night before.  I missed hanging out with my friend Paul.  Whoops.  I slept until 8 PM, then grogged about, watched Airplane, and went to bed.

Sunday morning we went to church:



And after lunch at home, we took a walk, where we ran into THIS:



Yes.  That's a raccoon on a leash.  It was so cool!  The guy said he got it at a breeder's in Indiana (where "they'll breed anything, those crazy fuckers.")  His name was Miko, and apparently he's a chick magnet.  Well, he certainly attracted the gays, too.  Or maybe the guy who it belonged to had something to do with that...



Oh, yes.  He was pretty, with sweet blue eyes and a good smile.  And a raccoon!  A RACCOON, Y'ALL!  I pet a raccoon.  How strange.

So, altogether a strange and wonderful weekend.  I hope yours was even half as good!

Out

Friday, March 26, 2010

Morning Stops...

I went back to interview again this morning. It was sort of awkward, because he sat on the same side of the desk as me. We were in Lori's office again, and she was sitting behind her desk. It was obvious he was unprepared for the interview. He kept shuffling through my resume and application at breakneck speed, sort of like studying ten second before the test hits your desk.

I can't really fault him, though, because I don't think they told him he'd be interviewing me today until he walked in this morning, and since the lobby opens at nine, and I showed up at nine-fifteen, I'm guessing he didn't walk in too much further ahead of me. Blah.

I didn't feel like this interview went as well, but maybe that was just because he wasn't prepared as much. I don't know, really. It wasn't as smooth. And I didn't really like him.

And I called Lori by the wrong name. I called her Lisa. Dang it. But they seemed impressed that the old job was trusting me to do leadership type stuff. So, who knows. I think that might balance out "the incident", as I've come to call the specifics of my termination. Blah. He seemed a little shaken by that whole explanation...with good reason, but...

I dunno. Lori told me that the hiring process there works very slowly. We shall see. In the meantime, I'll just keep looking, applying, and calling around.

Oh, and I stopped by the library today. I checked out Maus (they actually had the full volume, which I didn't know before--that should make you happy, Maureen). And then I got some CDs. This is a window into my musical tastes: I got Norah Jones, Moby, and Switchfoot. All new. And then I listened to Adam Lambert on the way home.

And now? I think I'ma play Cave Story on my Wii. If you have a Wii and you liked any Metroid game that has come out before Gamecube, or you just like that retro charm and a kickass game, GET IT! Download it on the Wii Shop Channel for 1200 points. It's totally worth it.

I'm...Out

Thursday, March 25, 2010

Success!

So, I was worried about my interview. I didn't sleep well. I imagined every terrible scenario, most of which involved them asking me why I'm no longer working with National City.

Turns out, I didn't really have much to worry about.

She DID ask me what happened over there, and I explained to her my situation, about the bad check and the woman who had had an account with us since the 70s and the policy for bypassing holds. And do you know what she said to me? She said, "I don't think it should be the teller's responsibility to decide whether or not to place holds on checks." Seriously. That was it. We talked about it, she said it was a raw deal and that she didn't think I did anything wrong, that I shouldn't have ever been fired for that.

She said exactly what everyone else has said every time I tell that story. Why did I assume she'd say anything different.?

We chatted. It turns out she lives in the town where I held my job before National City, that I probably know her from Sullivan's. Huh. How about that. So we have this instant rapport.

I was supposed to be in the interview with her and the branch's Assistant Manager. He had the day off unexpectedly, since he worked for a teller who was off on Tuesday. So I have another interview with HIM tomorrow. And now I'm thinking I'm worried because I don't make as great an impression on guys as I do with 40 something ladies.

But I think it went really well. I think I've got a good shot.

Out

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Good News!

I'm'a let this post speak for itself.

I HAVE A JOB INTERVIEW TOMORROW!!!

That is all.

Oh, and I'm not LEAVING or quitting. I'm just cutting way back on the number of things I read each day here. I'm still posting. I'm still commenting on stuff. I'm just a little overwhelmed when I have to play catch up for three days for missing one day of reading blogs. It's a little ridiculous.

Anywho, I'm still here! Just in a diminished capacity on the reading front.

Out

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Absent...

I am absent. I may be back, but I'm no longer spending hours of time reading blogs here. At least not every day. A few of you I'm sure I will keep reading, just because I love your blogs.

If you want to read my blogs, I'll probably still be posting them here and at http://viewtiful-justin.xanga.com.

Out

Monday, March 22, 2010

Sew...

The party was canceled, because everyone backed out. My friend Nichole's dog is sick and she didn't feel like going out. Some other friends stayed with her for moral support. Two couldn't find a babysitter. One was in a play. So...that left three of us getting together. So we relocated the party to my house.

They brought wine. We had a Catawba pink, a moscato, a pinot grigio, and a bottle of super sweet red called Li'l Ol' Truk. It's my mom's favorite.

So, needless to say, we drank too much wine. Chips and salsa, chocolate covered raisins...it was a strange night. I saw a boob. I dated that boob in high school, middle school. I share a birthday with that boob. We talked, sat in the kitchen, perched on counters and stools, played with the cat, refilled and drained glasses.

I needed it.

The next night, we went to see a friend play the lead in Little Shop of Horrors. He was great. The rest of the cast? Eh...there were a few places where I was wincing. Harmonizing that didn't work, timing that was off, voices that couldn't be understood no matter what they said. But we had fun.

I needed it.

Last night I went home to see my mom. I picked up some jigsaw puzzles from home. I drank some wine, Port of Utica, which is like Li'l Ol' Truk on steroids. We had a huge dinner with a pork roast, mashed potatoes, cranberry sauce, apple sauce, biscuits, salad...it was wonderful.

I needed it.

And now? Who knows...currently I'm listening to Adam Lambert telling me that he's here for my entertainment. If only. Otherwise, I'm waiting for an employer to call me about a job in Sycamore. And I have to see if anybody got back to me about several jobs I applied for last week.

My standards have dropped, now that I'm not getting unemployment. Ugh. Maybe I'll have a promising interview somewhere good.

I need it.

Out

Friday, March 19, 2010

Last night hanging out with friends was awesome! Derek and I cruised through our Alma Mater, went to the mall, cruised back through, told stories, laughed, had genuine great conversation, and then met friends for pizza. It was awesome. I saw people I hadn't seen in years. My abs hurt this morning because I laughed so much yesterday. I think Derek is the funniest person I know.

And that was amazing.

And then today I get a letter in the mail from unemployment. I've been denied benefits. FML.

And tonight we're getting together for an "I have too much alcohol in my house and you all should come drink it" party at my friend Katie's house. So...it's perfect timing.

Don't wait up.

Out

Thursday, March 18, 2010

It was the most gorgeous day yesterday.  And today?  It's supposed to be EVEN NICER!  So, as I've been itching to do since fall, I hopped on my bike and cruised through town.  Oh my gosh, it was lovely!  I happened upon some new graffiti on the trail, and it made me wonder if it was put there in the fall or winter or just recently, although it looks like someone tried to paint over it unsuccessfully a while ago, so my money is on fall.  Anywho:



"How many have to die?  STOP THIS WAR"

And about three feet down was this:



"Free Tibet."  Good advice.  I think I'll put it on my to-do list for the day.

And, close to my own heart, someone did this:



A cute little bird...oh, and my shadow.  You can't see it there, but the wind was doing tragic things to my WAY-TOO-LONG hair.  It was a wreck.

But I had this little gem to remind me that it didn't matter:





It says, "Whatever you are, it's beautiful."  I'm just glad they got the punctuation correct.

And then I headed past the old train depot,



And into the college multi-family homes area, the older section of town.  While I was riding I noticed this building that I've never seen before, despite living in this area my whole life:



It looks like an old school or a hospital, but it was completely empty with "No Trespassing" signs all over it.  How strange that it's not in use AND that I'd never seen it before...And here DeKalb is in an uproar about building a new school...they're not even using this one!

But I continued, on a beeline for where the Water Guy works.



I took no photos of his place of employment because I didn't want to seem like a creeper, but mostly because I already have some.  So you get this church steeple and this odd house:



I love that neon lime door.  How cute!

I'd never really been in this area, so I rode around for a while, taking some photos.  This house was all decked out for Spring, and I wondered if it always looked like that:



Cute. 

I was exhausted, though, and I had decided that I needed a hair cut.  Badly.  So, I rode home, past an inadvertently funny sign that's in a neighbor's lawn.  There's a back story here.  The county is discussing building a huge landfill somewhere in the vicinity.  So people are sort of in an uproar over it.  Signs have popped up all over in the lawns of people who oppose it, and this is what they say:



Yeah...it kind of makes me want to take a giant steaming dump in their front lawn.  Not gonna lie.  I snicker every time I see one.  And then I crave chicken and dumplings, because what's the opposite of a mega dump?  A dumpling!  I'll be here all week.

Onto the hair cut.  Here's my truly atrocious before photo:



I look wasted, and sort of stoned.  I was neither.

And after?



Much better!  I got so many compliments on the beard at church last night...it's a little overwhelming.  So...there.  Welcome to my day yesterday.  What you didn't see?  Three hours of Final Fantasy II, and me dancing along to Adam Lambert in my car.  That's about it.

I hope you take some time to get outside and enjoy the weather, if it is, indeed, nice today.  My old college friend Derek (derektb) is coming out here in the afternoon and we're going to drive to our old Alma Mater with the windows down and the music on and then meet some people for dinner later.  It'll be a hoot.

Out

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

The Horror...

Here's a poem I wrote this morning. I'm not sure where it came from. Can you pick the horror (ish) movie titles out of it?

The Horror

I know what you did last summer, he'll say.
And I'll scream and run to my panic room.
It will be 28 days from hell
And he'll scream, too.
We'll stay up, like night of the living dead,
My jaws tiring from talking it out.
It will be the omen I've been looking for
With the eye that's full of twilight.
And I'll know it's the end of days.

I think there's 12 in there. I don't know why I wrote this...it's so lame.

Out

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Census 2010...

I've never participated in the U.S. Census before. I think I just didn't get the forms or something. I don't know. But yesterday the forms came, and I happily tore open the envelope. And honestly? I was a little let down. I was expecting more, I think. It was done in two seconds and I went, "That's it?"

But I did have the joy of marking the box that said that Robb was my unmarried partner of the same gender. That was monumental and made me feel more visible.

Of course, according to the guy at the donation center at Goodwill yesterday, I'm not being visible enough with my Human Rights Campaign sticker on the back of my car. Umm...okay, assface. I'm not going to plaster my car with rainbows. I think that's tacky. He practically accused me of being in the closet. At first, I didn't know what to feel about it, but now? I think it was really rude of him to tell me, "Nice sticker," and genuinely mean it, but then to follow it up by telling me I wasn't doing enough. Bah!

But I got to see Aaron, who works there, and he's always a sweetie. I miss seeing him at the bank. Anywho...it's off to my magical day of nothing.

Out

Monday, March 15, 2010

Weekend In Photos...



This is how the weekend started.  I threw on my blue plaid shirt with the green undershirt, the one that makes my chest and arms look bigger than they are.  Then people came over to our place, and we explored the attic space I'd been too scared to look in since we moved in.  No ghosts.  We took some video and ran voice recorders, hoping to pick up some kind of EVP from our apartment ghost(s?).  So far, nothing doing.  Then we took a midnight (train to Georgia...woo woo!) trip to another friend's house.  She wasn't expecting us, and we rolled out the welcome banner we'd made while she poured us some wine.  I drank too much and got kind of silly.  It was nice to visit.

Saturday, Robb and I visited the library in town.  I got some more CDs, and I was pleasantly surprised to see the daffodils (my favorite flower because the portend Spring) poking through the mud next to the walk.



We hung around the apartment, mostly.  It was nice having the boy home for a change, since the ski season is officially over.  So we basked in the homey Saturdayness of the morning and afternoon, and then we headed off.  We stopped to meet friends in Manhattan (not NY) where one of them was working.  Mutual harassment ensued.  Then we went back to her place and met her new friend:



That would be Sadie, the chinchilla.  So adorable, and soooo soft.  She was a little ball of crazy energy.

Sunday morning Robb and I planned to go to church, so we got up at 8:30, realized it was actually 9:30, and went back to bed.  I hate rushing to get ready in the morning.  It puts me in a bad mood.  So I just decided we would skip church entirely.  Well...we slept until 11:45.  I hadn't slept well in almost a week, so it was a nice change.  And then I rushed to get ready for my writer's group, which was having a special meeting. 



I drew this confused cat bird...sort of a way for me to sort out my feelings about a friend of mine who is newly transgendered.  It's really hard to stop calling him Ian and start calling her Elaine...and the pronouns...oh, the pronouns!  I'll get it right one day.

So...after a full day, Robb and I ordered pizza.  I hadn't eaten all day, so we finished the whole thing.  That night, I had the happiest dream ever!  I got a pygmy hippo as a pet, and he LOVED cat food and potatoes.  So freaking adorable I could spit!

And this morning?



I've got a whole list of things to do...one of which I can now cross off.

--Call on resume
--Rip CDs
--Take clothes and computer monitor to Goodwill
--Check jobs
--Do critique stuff
--Blog
--Pet the cat
--Check Wii Shop Channel

Out

Saturday, March 13, 2010

I held a chinchilla this evening before riding around in cars looking at houses that are for sale. Our friends are wonderfully strange...Happy Saturday!

Friday, March 12, 2010

What Do You Do With a BA in English...

Yes, friends, today I secured tickets (thanks to my lovely and amazing boyfriend) to go see Avenue Q!! It's not till may...but until then, I'll be watching these videos. Check them out if you're uninitiated!



Or this one:



Or this one:



I'm so excited I could pee!!!!

Out

Thursday, March 11, 2010

Blah Rainy Fa So La Ti Do...

This is what I woke up to this morning:



Rainy day...
but that's okay, 
It means that Spring
is on its way!

Goooooo SPRING!

*ahem*

I don't know what that was...I think I was channeling my inner cheerleader.  Yikes.  I'm going to step away from the pompons, now. 

Umm...you all wanted to see the facial hair, right?  Well...here's the saga for the past few days (all photos were taken from a folder on my computer called "Beard Saga"--true story) :



This would be me (Tuesday) wearing the cutout from a box of canned cat food.  When it's torn off, it looks like a great tie!  What say I wear this to a job interview some day?  No?

Then Robb took the camera and started snapping.  "Give me skanky.  Give me annoyed.  Give me have to shit."



And apparently you can't change the photo's orientation once it is uploaded.  Pity...











So...after my impromptu, sideways photo shoot, the world righted itself.

I took these after my shower yesterday:









And then I took these this morning, not much different:







Ignore the bedhead.  So yeah,...it's not so bad.  What do you think, all?  Good?  Bad?  Ugly?

Anywho...there it is.  I'll probably keep on keepin' on until I have an interview.  Then I'll shave it.  I don't want to look like a hobo during my first impression...unless you think it would help...would it help to look like I've been living under a bridge?

Out

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Twitterpated...

It is Spring, y'all! How do I know? I went out last night without a coat on. The library had their front doors standing wide open. And it's been raining for days.

All I need is for Robb to tell me he's done for the season at the ski hill, and we're set. Heck, I even rode my bike the other day! I thought I was going to die, but I rode it.

In other news, I am letting my facial hair grow out. I'm keeping it clean, but I sort of like it, and I've had two compliments on it. Robb apparently likes the scruffy look more than he thought he would. Pictures will follow, eventually.

Has anyone ever read Maxwell Strangewell? I'm LOVING it.

Out

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Day Off...

I'm taking a day off from blogging today, I think.

What would you like to see when I come back?

Out

Monday, March 8, 2010

2D vs. 3D...

Now that I've seen Alice in Wonderland in both 3D and 2D, I'll say this:

It was a good movie. Very fun if you're familiar with Lewis Carroll's works, especially the poem Jabberwocky, despite the fact that they BUTCHER it for the sake of the movie--replacing the word "Jub-Jub bird" with "Jabberwock" even though the Jub-Jub bird is IN the freaking movie. I digress. But really, I couldn't have seen enough of the Red Queen's castle. That heart-shaped arch in the front just blows me away every time I see it! Amazing stuff. And so funny!

So yes, I'd recommend that you go see it before it is out of theaters. But the hard question remains: 2D, or 3D?

Well, I found the 3D to be completely distracting at times. It was well done, and the movie seemed to be made with 3D in mind, what with the action coming at the screen more often than not. There were several times I was ducking or leaning. And the color! Oh, the color was so amazing! But I feel like I missed seeing a lot of stuff because I was distracted by what was #d and what was not.

The boy and I saw it in 2D last night, and I seemed to catch more of the movie than I did when we saw it in 3D. It may have been the theater in which we saw it, but the color wasn't nearly as impressive as it was in the 3D showing. And again...it just could have been the quality of the film or the theater's machine or whatever...it just seemed sort of washed out.

So, my analysis? In 3D, I didn't see as much as in 2D, but what I did see was far more impressive. And in 2D, I saw everything, but it wasn't nearly as pretty.

So...there. I guess I'd recommend seeing it in 3D over the 2D, and that's hard for me to say, since I'm sort of against the whole 3D movement.

But that, dear friends, is another post.

Out

Saturday, March 6, 2010

I just left my apartment because I was hearing noises and smelling a woman's perfume. Just before I left it got all cold in there. Haunted, much?

If you were stranded on a desert island, which one person would you bring with you?

Robb, because if I had to be in a situation like that, at least I'd like to be able to laugh and have fun. He's the funnest person I've ever met. And if not him...someone who could build a friggin boat!

Ask me anything!

What is your favorite book and why?

Harriet the Spy. It awakened me to world I never dreamed of, to writing, to humor, to pain. It was my gateway book, I think.

Ask me anything!

Friday, March 5, 2010

Amazing Internet Video Friday!!!

After the serious dose of heavy that was yesterday's post, I thought we all could use a little amazing!

Check it out!



I know right?! Amazing stuff.

Out

Thursday, March 4, 2010

The More you Know...

When I was younger, my friend Brian and I used to hang out quite a bit. Our houses were relatively close to one another, but mostly we both just wanted someone to hang out with because we lived in the country. He was the funny, goofy kid with red hair and freckles that had rich parents and cool stuff. We used to play on his computer, and his taste in computer games has stuck with me to this day. I still get a kick out of killing an afternoon playing Space Quest or Shadows of Darkness.

I used to sleep over at his house, where we would stay up until all hours of the night writing stories or making swords out of wood. We would choreograph elaborate sword fights set to music and not sleep all night. I remember one night we even wrote the next game in the Final Fantasy series, convinced that the publishers would buy it from us without any doubt. It was a pretty good story, actually. But...

He used to come over to my house and play games with my brother and I. And my brother, once upon a time, was a pot head. We got new neighbors in the house right next door (the only house around), and they brought with them from the wreckage of their burned down house bad influences...and a Playstation. I used to play Playstation at their house while my brother and his new neighbor/friend Jason went off to smoke pot.

Well, often times Brian would come over under the guise of hanging out, only to go off with my brother and Jason to smoke pot with them. I'm mostly convinced it was because he thought they were so cool, and he wanted to be cool, too. I never wanted to be cool that badly.

We continued to hang out at each others' houses, but when I went to his house I mostly wanted to hang out with his little brother Robbie, because he was just like Brian used to be. You see, Brian stopped being fun. All he cared about was when he would get to smoke pot next. He started hanging out with the deadbeats in our class, and I felt more and more like the nerd that was, once again, being left behind for something cool.

I remember the last time I spent any time with him. His parents were throwing a huge 4th of July party. I went, because my parents were invited. I didn't really want to be there. I was sort of over Brian. When I got there he was nowhere to be found. His mother told me he was with his friends up in the barn.

The barn used to be that place where we'd swordfight and build forts and start fires and break stuff. It was a giant, endless playground where we could do basically whatever we wanted and not get in trouble for it. It was our space.

Well, I went into the barn, calling Brian's name. His coughing response came from upstairs. He was in our fort with a bunch of kids from school I didn't really like. I didn't go in, but chose to talk to him from the ladder. All I saw of him that night was the intermittent flickering of a lighter put to a bowl. After turning down an invitation to join them, I went to find my parents and told them I was leaving.

I never really saw Brian after that. He joined the Army, lied about his skill level, and then got kicked out for doing drugs. Last I heard he was cleaning grease traps or sewer lines or something.

I still miss him from time to time, especially when I'm driving by his road, all alone, in the country.

Out

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Umm...What Do I Say?

So...I've sat here for five minutes trying to figure out what I should post about today.  There's nothing new going on.

Eh...I got some CDs from the library, one of which was The Shins's Wincing the Night Away, and, honestly...I don't get it.  Maybe I haven't given it enough time to grow on me, but I've heard such great things from so many different people about it that I was really disappointed.  It's a little too...whiny...too precious...too...formless?  The songs are more like amorphous clouds of music and words than SONGS.  And when I can't find form in a song, it makes me sort of want it to be over, like, NOW. 

I emailed my brother in Iraq this morning.  I haven't heard from him in a few months, and I'm hoping he's okay.  I'm sure he's fine.  We got a long time without talking even when he's in the states.  But last I heard his wife hadn't heard from him and my mom hadn't heard from him in a while.  Hrm. 

*deleted*  I just started telling you guys about the lead that turned out to be an automotive job again.  Wow.  I really AM boring right now.

Blah.  Sorry for the lack of meat and potatoes.  Maybe you can caption this photo:



Have fun!

Out

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Another Bank?

Yes. I applied at another bank in town. This one's local (less bullshit and bureaucracy? I hope so.) and has a bunch of locations around town. They've got several teller openings, so...maybe I'll be able to get right back in where I left off, but with the competition.

I'm not ecstatic about another bank job, but I'm qualified and it would be a steady income. And in a smaller bank, the possibility for advancement seems much more likely, since they're recruiting people from inside AND not from all across the whole dang country.

So...there's that. I also checked on a few jobs yesterday. One of them turned out to be in a garage, fixing cars. That's NOT "customer service" last I checked.

And now I'm typing around the cat, who just scared the hell out of me by launching himself onto the computer desk with a yowl. It's hard to see the keyboard or the monitor around a 14 pound cat.

Okay. I guess it's time to feed his royal highness.

Out

Monday, March 1, 2010

My Mother's Son...

This weekend was much needed. Not that it was really a break from anything...

Saturday night I went out to a friend's, and we just vegged out and played video games, talked about the Olympics, laughed, and basically just had a good time. I needed it, for sure.

Sunday I gave a friend a ride to church. After the service my mom came up and delivered me a shit ton of groceries: juice, bread, eggs, soup, chicken, hamburger, frozen dinners, vegetables, jelly, salsa, and a whole mess of other things. It most definitely threw a wrench into my eating cycle.

Am I the only one who has an eating cycle?

I map out what I think I'll be eating for a while based on what's good in the fridge. Like, "Oh, we made that stir fry on Wednesday, so I'll be having leftovers from that for lunch on Thursday and Friday. But there's still some pasta from Monday, so I should eat that first. But I really want that pizza."

Am I the only one who does that? I just hate it when food goes bad. I'd rather have a leftover party than throw ANYTHING away.

Luckily, a lot of the stuff my mom brought is frozen, so there's no eat by date on those. I'm just grateful I have a mom who cares enough to help us out in hard times. AND who takes me out to lunch! I miss eating out. When I find a job I'm SO going out to eat every day for a week.

Before she left we were talking about the Pell Grant and how now might be a good time to think about going back to school. She said, "And it probably wouldn't hurt to tell them you're gay. It's two steps away from being a single black mother!" When she was leaving I got out of her truck and shut the door, but it didn't close all the way. I opened it again and she laughs at me and goes, "God, you don't have to shut the door like a gay guy!"

She's awesome. Pretty much the best mom ever.

Out