Saturday, February 28, 2009


I am warm. Emotionally warm. I haven't been communicating on any fronts that have been rewarding in a long time. And now there are people in my life, albeit on the periphery, that make me glad to get up and go about my daily business.

They urge me to write. They help me to think. Or, more precisely, they give me something for my brain to chew.

And I'm reading. I haven't been reading as much as I'd like to in a long time. But right now, I'm flying through books. And talking about books. And realizing that people I care about hate the same books as I do for the same reasons. There's something nice about that, especially when everyone else thinks said book is amazing. And no, I'm not referring to Twilight. Anyone with an eye for good writing thinks that's garbage.

And despite an awkward, messy moment in the middle, I had a good fifteen minutes with the boy this morning.

All this leaves me sort of glowing right now. Glowing and wishing I wasn't sitting at home alone on a Saturday night.


Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Three Years...

Today Robb and I are celebrating our three year anniversary.

*double take*

Three years? Really? Gosh. It seems simultaneously like it has been so much longer and so much shorter than that. Crazy.

But really, I couldn't be a luckier man. Despite how annoyed with me he pretends to be.

Oh, and on a possibly unrelated note:

Your Bedroom Grade:
You are an expert in bed or should I say sexpert? But you're going to have to reach (around) for that A+. You are a natural in bed, and anyone that has had you brags about it long afterwards!
What's your Bedroom Grade? at

How about that? Apparently he's lucky, too.


Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Economic Problems Hit Home...

So, apparently EVERYTYING is closing. Good to know.

Yesterday the Baker's Square in town announced that on Wednesday at 2 they were done for good. Apparently Mason, their renters, doubled their rent at lease renegotiations. We (at the bank) all think that they probably have someone else ready to move in there, and our manager has heard a rumor that it might be IHOP. That would be kind of exciting, although I would never go because of the policies of the renters. Assholes.

And on top of that, I just found out that Filo Spinato, the Italian restaurant in town, closed its doors forever last Saturday. Without a peep.

Add to that Italian Express's closing a month or so ago and I'm starting to see that people in this town don't like Italian food...I blame Pizza Hut and their pasta crap.

It makes me worried for who is next...especially when all our business customers keep leaving for another bank or going out of business.


Monday, February 23, 2009

Return of George...

A few months ago, maybe early January, when I was at work I got a bill in a deposit from a small convenience store in town. The numbers on it had been covered over with dollar signs except for the top left, which had five zeroes added to the "1" on it. It was a $100,000 bill! I was enthralled. I took a photo (which I do whenever I find money with something written or stamped on it--which is fairly often--while at work).

I'm sure I sent it out with someone as change or in a request for dollar bills. It was gone. Until today.

It came back! This is, for sure, the same bill. And it came in with a deposit from the same business as before. Crazy. I've never had this happen to me before, in all the years I've been working with money. It made my day.

And now it's strapped with a bunch of other ones, and will most likely be going out as change to another business in town.

Anything like this ever happen to you?


Saturday, February 21, 2009


I just finished watching Closer starring Natalie Portman, Julia Roberts, Jude Law, and Clive Owen. What a messy movie. What a sad movie. And what a sobering movie.

I was going to put up a pulse that just said, "Clive Owen is gorgeous. ESPECIALLY when he's angry." But I knew I'd run out of space after I realized I wanted to talk about how messy that movie is. And about how much I love Julia Roberts...and Natalie Portman. They're both really good actors. At least, in my opinion.

But this isn't a post about JR and NP. It's a post about how delicious Clive Owen is. I never noticed before. And it's not all the time...just when he's distraught, crying, yelling, and just plain mad. Mmm. I would pluck his eyebrow hair just to watch him wince.

I mean, look.

Heck yes.

Watch the movie, and pay close attention to when he's bawling Julia Roberts out. Amazing.

This has been Man Candy Saturday Night with Viewtiful_Justin.


Alright then...

I am apparently not so good at selling milk. And someone has a new cow.

Perimeters...very important.


Friday, February 20, 2009


Where do those thing that we type that get eaten by the internet end up? Do they just disappear into the ether?

I believe that when we die, there will be a pile of all the socks we ever lost in the wash. And there will be a jar full of all the change we ever put in our pockets that wasn't there when we went to empty them. And that jar will be on a desk with a computer containing all that stuff we typed that forums and chat rooms and bulletin boards and blogs and emails just ate on it. And we'll look at it, shrug, not remembering any of it, and go play kickball for all eternity with all your old schooltime crushes.

How about that?




It's that time of year again. I'd better get my barf bag ready.

Peeps. *shudder*


God, I hate those little things.

How do you feel about them?


Thursday, February 19, 2009

Headline News and the Anti-Snub...

So, at church last night I decided to put some of my readers' advice into practice. We got to the sharing of the peace, and I made my way around the church, shaking hands and giving hugs to everyone. There was a bottleneck in one of the corners, and I got stuck behind a guy who was shaking everyone's hand. I was ready to head back to my seat, but I saw that if I skipped out of this traffic jam, I'd be skipping Jake (the snubber from earlier) entirely. I decided to stick it out, look him right in the eye, and shake his hand, offering God's peace.

I held out my hand, and he shook it, making eye contact for a millionth of a second before looking away--WAY away. I just confidently shook his hand and went back to my seat, smiling the whole way. Am I the bigger man in this situation? It would appear so, for once.

In other news, I stumbled across the truest headline I've ever seen in the NIU newspaper.

Truer words were never printed. Well, okay, so maybe there was a little more to this headline than I'm showing you, but they could have stopped there and no one would have argued.


Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Justin Does Chicago...

I'll just let these photos from the top of the John Hancock Center speak for themselves...

Monday, February 16, 2009

To the City!

I'm off to the city today with the boy. Since I work at a bank and he works for the government, we both get the day off today! I love that. So, what better to do than hit up thrift stores and our favorite restaurant: Nookie's Tree.

Photos may follow, if I decide to take some.


Saturday, February 14, 2009

Valentine's Day Surprise...

I didn't figure Robb had made time to go get me something for Valentine's Day since he's been so busy, and I was trying really hard not to be upset. I mean, it's only a day, and we talked about how stupid it is. As long as we'd be spending some time together. But then I went and got him a really nice box of chocolates, and then I found out he wasn't going to be home because they'd asked him to work, and I thought that he'd better have gotten me a damn nice gift to make up for THAT one.

And when I went into the kitchen this morning, this is what I found:

Daffodils. My favorite flower. So out of season right now. They were in a beautiful square vase on the kitchen table with some Ghirardelli mixed chocolates and some Hershey's Kisses. I was so floored, so melty. It's too bad he's not around, because I can assure you I'd be busy doing something other than blogging right now.

The most amazing part is that I have no freaking idea where in the world he found the time to do this for me. He said he was carting those flowers around all day yesterday. *melt*

What do you like about your Valentine?


Friday, February 13, 2009

Friday the 13th...

So, this morning I was a superstitious man.

I woke up significantly late. I found out my boy isn't going to be around at all on Valentine's Day. There was this double-layered permafrost on my windshield that took for freaking ever to get off. By the time I got to work, I was cursing this day that otherwise I would let pass with a shrug. And then the computer I was planning on working on was unavailable, leaving me to have to work on the crappy one up front. And that's just the stuff that I want to mention here...


Apparently it is turning around. After 9 the computer started miraculously being okay, so I moved to it. And then I realized it's payday. And the day the water guy shows up. That could brighten ANY day. Add to all of that the fact that we just heard that as of the 20th we're no longer doing Money Grams at work (the bane of ALL OF OUR existences). And then, the crowning moment of the day: the letter.

We got this letter from a customer, complaining about charges on her account. She came in a few weeks ago and we refunded the charges, and the letter was just to let us know that we never refunded the penny in her savings account. The penny that we put there in the first place. And...gosh was it worth sending with a 42 cent stamp. Seriously? Are there people that are that dense? Apparently so. And just to cement her identity as the brilliant one, she told us to send her the penny at the address listed above, which read [name here], DeKalb, IL, 60115. No street address.

Oh yeah. Made my day.

So, yeah...the day really is turning around.

Good for me.


Thursday, February 12, 2009

Please, Don't Sit There...

I wrote this poem for my writer's group this week. I guess it's a reaction to the feelings I am having over some people in my life that I wish didn't mean so much to me.


Please, Don't Sit There

I've dethroned enough people to see this coming,
This "kiss my feet" mentality.
That look you give me that says it all:
"You owe me everything."

And yet.

I've once again left that seat unguarded,
Even fluffed the cushion for you.
I'm not strong enough to oust another king.
So please, don't sit there.



Snubbed At Church...

This has been stewing in my head for a few weeks now. As much as I try to tell myself not to get upset over it, as much as I try to push it down and call myself stupid for even thinking about it, here it is. I have been irked on several occasions over the past year by this certain guy at church. He is your typical chats-through-the-service-with-his-friends kind of guy, and he's painfully straight with his big arms always crossed across his big chest, his swagger, and the ease with which he fires off judgmental glares at people and flirts shamelessly with the ladies. That's not so much what bothers me.

What bothers me is that he is the only person in the whole congregation who has never said one word to me, even when I've tried to talk to him. I get a grunt followed by an evasive maneuver.

But a few weeks ago was the last straw.

I go to a Lutheran church on campus that is for college students, and it's "open and affirming" of gay and lesbian congregation members. Hell, one of our ministers is a lesbian. Anywho, if you've ever been to a Lutheran church (or any number of other denominations who do this), we do what is called "the sharing of the peace." We go around the congregation and shake hands and give hugs and say "God's peace" to each other. It's really a ridiculous practice, I think, and it's always made me kind of uncomfortable, but we do it. And being that it's a college campus, we do this with an exuberance you don't see most other places.

Well, a few weeks ago I went alone because Robb was working, and this guy, who we'll call Jake (mostly because that's his name), sat two seats down from me. When it came time for the sharing of the peace, I thought I'd be the bigger man, shake his hand, and make sure this whole thing was just in my head. I stood up and turned, holding out my hand, and he looked at me. He turned. And he gave the person sitting next to him a hug that included several glances at my outstretched hand and lasted until I turned around and walked away because I felt that familiar twinge I last felt in junior high when I was picked last in gym class.

He fucking snubbed me. At church.

And now that I think about it, he's never shaken my hand during the sharing of the peace in the whole year I've been going to that church. Never.

I am at the point where I want to approach him and ask him if he has a problem with me, if there is something I did to him that makes him clearly uncomfortable around me. And I know it's not worth it. I know I should let it go and just chalk it up to him being a straight guy who is super uncomfortable with the gay guys at church. But I say fuck that. I let things go more often than I should, and I am a very likable guy. I have no enemies, honestly, that I know of (besides my father, but that's a whole other therapy session). I don't make it a point to make them. So...what gives?

It tears me up enough that I had a dream about it last night. He made some comment in this dream about how I was hitting on all the girls, and I turned to him and said, "Ummm...memo! I'm gay!" and he said he knew that because I was always staring at him. To which I responded, "News flash. You have nothing to worry about. You disgust me, honestly, and the only reason I'm looking at you at all is because I'm amazed at how big of an asshole you can be without even trying!"

But it was a dream...and this is reality...and I'll probably just tuck my tail and hope he doesn't show up next week.


Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Premier Blog...

So here's the deal.

I've been blogging on Xanga under the moniker Viewtiful_Justin for around five years. It's been a wonderful ride, and I don't plan to stop that. However, the drama over there has gotten to be a slightly less than encouraging environment for creativity, and the atmosphere over here seems a bit more adult.

So here I am.

Plus, I've found some amazing blogs over here (kyle-cummings, bent objects, mattiasa, cakewrecks, melissabxoxo, and dnrshow) that I would like to keep in touch with. And I figured I'd see them all more often if I was doing a little something over here as well. But the biggest draw for me, at least today, as I sit here in front of the big picture window and watch the rain come down on all the passing cars, is that I can BLOG AT WORK!

Hooray for blogspot not being blocked. This is a revolution. Now I can blog about my crappy customers AS THEY LEAVE!

This is a whole new world.

Viewtiful_Justin on blogspot at work...Out