If I'd have known that this simple phrase would have led to two hours of one-sided conversation, I'd have found a good way to indicate that I wasn't interested before it was too late.
But I'm polite. So I listened to this customer tell me his story. Granted, he's a regular customer and someone whose company I actually enjoy. He's in customer service and is just as cynical and annoyed by everyone as I am. So we share stories. And we've built a sort of rapport.
"So I'm talking to this girl..."
And it turns out that she is someone he's been into since high school, who was married--IS MARRIED--but who just started talking to him again. She told him her husband didn't want to be with her anymore. She fished for compliments for DAYS, then told him she hated girls who fished for compliments. They talked about sex, and she basically told him she'd have sex with him. But she kept telling him she was unavailable. And she called him wishy-washy. So he told her about his feelings for her. And she unfriended and blocked him. And then one of their mutual friends blocked him when he tried to talk to her about it.
And basically, this was a two hour repetitive story. While I was trying to close the store. It was a quiet night, but still. DUDE! TWO HOURS! I think he's lonely and depressed and wanted someone neutral to talk to. But I don't make therapist wages, and I'm gonna catch hell tomorrow for all the shit we didn't get done or that was done half-assed.
But here's the thing. She sounds like a crazy. She sounds like she was giving mixed signals. And he was pretty honest from the get go about his feelings for her. And now he feels the whole situation is unfair and he didn't do anything to incur her wrath. BUT. She told him she's unavailable. She's clearly going through a divorce. And he should have respected her enough to back off. No means no. Just because she flirted with you and said she'd let you take her to the beach and that she'd bang you doesn't mean you're entitled to anything. It just means she's a crazy. Who is mixed up. And maybe doesn't quite know what she wants.
But that still doesn't mean you're entitled to anything.
It must be exhausting to be a woman. I've been thinking a lot about that lately, actually. But that's a post for another time. Maybe tomorrow if I get a second. We'll see.
the first attack wave
41 minutes ago